Parenting your child mindfully during and post-divorce

On behalf of Bebout, Potere, Cox & Bennion, P.C. posted in child custody on Monday, October 10, 2016.

The concept of mindfulness has recently become a mainstream popular culture reference. Authors, television characters and even musicians speak frequently about mindfulness in regards to eating, exercising, everyday living and love. Some of these references to mindfulness are more helpful than others. But overall, it never hurts to commit to being more mindful.

This is perhaps especially true during times of emotional upheaval. Mindfulness can help to ground you when you would otherwise be tempted to give into a negative emotional spiral. For example, if you are going through the process of divorcing or have recently done so, committing to mindfulness can help you personally and it can help you to be a more supportive and effective parent.

Parenting mindfully

At its most basic, a mindful approach means focusing your mental and emotional energy on the present moment. During and immediately after the divorce process, it can be startlingly easy to focus on the past and/or the future. Parenting mindfully may help you to better support your child in the here and now.

This is not to say that a mindful parent fails to learn from the past or dismisses the future. Instead, mindfulness can aid in ensuring that being one’s best self in the present builds a foundation for a strong future. For example, learning about how your children are adjusting to your divorce in the present can help to inspire you to advocate for modifications to your parenting plan when necessary, in order to ensure that their needs are met going forward.

Modeling mindfulness

In addition, parenting with a mindful approach can help to provide your children with excellent role modeling. Children can also get stuck in the past and/or future when adjusting to divorce. If you help to show them how healthy and strong you are becoming by remaining present and doing your best in the here and now, they may be inspired to do the same.

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